When Frida Hard lost her husband and was left alone with their one-year-old son, the world shook. It wasn't just a love she lost, it was a nuclear family, a vision of the future, an identity.
“It was like the ground was disappearing under me. In the midst of it, I realized how difficult it is for many to face grief. How little space it gets to take up in our society. How quiet it gets,” says Frida.
She began to notice what was missing. Not just support, but a place of grief. Utensils. Attendance.
“Many of us have never been taught how to deal with or face grief. Neither in school, in work, nor in everyday life. It's almost strange. For everyone has or/and will face grief. But we talk so little about it.”
Grief not only became a life-changing experience, it became a driving force. Frida wanted to change something. Make room for the missed conversations. For the feelings that were not expressed. For the quiet rooms where people carry on the difficult, completely alone.
She began to put into words recurring themes in the grief, themes rarely mentioned in superficial conversations: the fear, the anger, the loss of identity.
“I wasn't just sitting. I was angry. I was lost. I didn't recognize myself. A grieve came with so many fears I had to face: How would I cope financially? Was I enough as a mother? Would I ever feel happy again?”
Grief support: a place where grief is allowed to breathe
Six years ago Frida started Grief Support, a business where today she offers mourning circles, lectures, writing exercises and talks, for both individuals and companies.
“Getting to recognize yourself in other people's stories can be so healing. Sometimes we find it difficult to find our own words in grief. But when someone else says something we recognize ourselves in or that we feel completely different about, it can help us find our language, our words. And our new direction.”
Frida continues:”I want to be the voice that I myself lacked, one that says it's okay to feel exactly the way you feel and that all reactions are allowed to exist. If the grieve does not have the essence soaked or silenced, I am allowed to dry in your pocket. I want to be a safe hand to hold in grief.“
